By Karleigh Webb
Say Cis-Straight-Het Black Fam,
Our hearts are sick and sad as I write this.
Once again, we see it on our social media, splashed over in high definition.
We see our brother George on the ground. We see the knee in the back. We saw our brother George pleading for air. Pleading for life as it was draining away.
George Floyd.
Just like our sister Breonna, and our brother Ahmaud
And Philando. And Sandra.
Our nephew Trayvon. Our son Tamir.
I know, Black family. We are suffocating. We can’t breathe.
Once again, we see state-sponsored violence.
And we saw it close to home.
Remember two people out on a date in New Haven?
That was a little more than a year ago. I haven’t forgotten, because I was there marching.
I see the fires burning, too. Ferguson, meet Minneapolis.
Yes, Fam. I’m there.
I’m there for you. I yell it, too.
“NO JUSTICE, NO PEACE! NO RACIST POLICE!”
But, may I pull your coat to something?
There was family killed a few days later in Florida.
His name was Tony McDade.
Yes, I know what you thought you heard, but HE had a name.
He was rainbow family. Just like the brother in Central Park.
You know the one.
That lady said an “AFRICAN-AMERICAN MAN THREATENING ME!” when all he said was, “Lady, please keep your dog on a leash.”
I noticed the outrage, until it was reported that he’s gay and created heroic mythos in the comic pages that was gay.
The outrage sort of muted after that.
I saw it across social media. I heard it on our airwaves.
Yes, he’s gay.
Gay like Rustin. Gay like Langston. Gay like Richard. Gay like Octavia.
Gay like James. Yes family, I saw your t-shirt. We love some Mr. Baldwin. I know that he’s our man, as long as we don’t talk about “that gay stuff”.
Now my cisgender and straight brother and sisters, and some of you cis-gay people as well.
Excuse me, NO! Don’t give me that “Alphabet People” wackness.
We are you! I am because WE ARE! We are tired, Black.
I’m tired, Black.
I’m tired of the homophobia.
I’m tired of you hiding behind the sacred word I believe in and using it as a club on the backs, necks and heads of our Black rainbow family.
Yes, you’ll see me in the Lord’s House, but I understand why many of mine aren’t there.
I’m tired of hearing that “those LGBTQ people have never been a part of The Movement”. You sure about that, family?
From before the Harlem Renaissance to studying battleplans with Bayard to Black Lives Matter today, you’ve seen “those people” – my people, our people, everywhere EXCEPT on the bench.
Our people at home and away have been running point in the liberation struggle, marched in the struggle and, when it came to gay rights, we took the playbook we wrote and expanded the struggle.
I’m proud of that. Why aren’t you?
Huey and Bobby understood it.
Angela understood it and still speaks on it.
Yes, Black family. Me and mine have been at barricades, even though many of you didn’t want us there or questioned our place to be there.
I see the protests in Minneapolis now and I raised a fist, but I also know my sister CeCe MacDonald would have loved to see some of you raising your fist a few years ago.
She defended herself against a transphobe/white nationalist. She was arrested for being black, trans and willing to defend her life and she WAS placed in men’s prison for the crime of defending herself. She was there for 19 months as concerned people, mostly queer, fought for her release.
Where were you then, cisgender straight Black family?
I’m tired of being told that I need to choose the truth of blackness OR the truth of my transness/queerness.
Last year, 25 people who match much of my demographic data were murdered, Black.
That could be me, and it scares me.
What did any of them get from you, family? They got a “they deserved it” and a deadname, in addition to being dead.
I get an “I deserve it”, a Dave Chapelle punchline, and some nobody with a music career-by-Garage Band demeaning proud Black trans folk on “The Breakfast Club” just for living our lives.
I’m tired of hearing how my LGBTQ people are the cause of “the breakdown of the family”, when you and yours are throwing your children, OUR children out in the street because they are “that way”.
And if we aren’t throwing them out on the street, we throw them to the wolves for mistreatment in our schools systems, universities and recreational spaces. We even have people demonize them and a state Republican party raise campaign cash off of that demonization.
Every black mama has told their child, “I will NEVER let anyone mistreat my child!”
Family, are you okay with Andraya Yearwood and Terry Miller being disrespected by paid political transphobes? Your silence has been loud for a minute on this, my people.
Are you cool with going on Twitter and doing that to Zaya Wade? Will you do that when your kin comes out and comes to the cookout? Will you freeze them out?
Listen, family. I’m asking, WHERE YOU AT? No, I’m not saying we’re leaving you because, to quote my grandfather, “you don’t leave the black race alive”.
Heed what I’m telling you.
Your queer family is calling you.
Your lesbian auntie and her “special friend” are calling you.
Your gay brother is calling you.
That homey who may be seeking to come out and you’ve been they ace since forever, is calling you.
That cat whom you may not be sure where they identify, but they are always ready to organize and agitate even as you flub the pronouns, is calling you.
That child who is affirming who they are and needs your backup, is calling you.
Our queer elders caught in neglect by orientation, identity and race are calling you.
I’m scared as hell, mad as hell, and yes, I will side-eye you when you misgender me. Still, I’m calling you.
The ancestors who were before colonization took so much away, including our intrinsic being, are calling you.
We’re calling you in for this Pride month to organize together, resist together and be there for each other. Pride 2020 we may not have the party, but we have an important purpose and the purpose involves you, cis-straight Black family.
In this battle for our total Black Liberation you’ve been AWOL for too long, and we have duty to win.
After all, we are aren’t getting to Black Liberation from A to Z without “LGBTQ”.
Karleigh Webb is a writer contributor for Outsports, a freelance media producer and a crisis operator for Trans Lifeline.
